blegh

how I feel I guess. sinus headache. Had 6hrs of rehearsal yesterday, 4hrs today. Concert tomorrow, we're meeting at 8am to leave, it's in Greenville. *sigh* I think some of the choir people wonder why I'm so quiet and antisocial. Yesterday, I just wasn't on my zoloft, and I was sick, so I was in a fairly bad mood...today was better, I did take my medicine, and I was feeling a bit better...just got back a little bit ago from a karaoke party at Holland's house. I was a bit more social there at the beginning though....wasn't so much after some other people showed up. Aaron J. said, after hearing me sing, that I'd better be careful or I'd get out of character for me. Amusing. Wonder if I'll ever be able to be myself...I criticize people for being fake, but I'm unable to open up myself...is that hypocrisy, or is that two different issues? anyways, since I'm on the zoloft, I can't be depressed as I normally would, even though it doesn't work too well...I need to have a conversation with Amber sometime, something she said in one of her surveys worries me a bit, just want to see if I can help...and see if compassion turns into love...lol. be nice if she could feel that way about me. *sigh* loneliness is likely to be the death of me...