some thoughts

yeah. well, let me get a few things out of the way first. Got that job at the dealership, I start Monday morning. Hope my schedule isn't bad, and they said they'd pay me more than $6.50 per hour, so that's good...Megan left for NYC today. I'll probably get to hear about it on Monday, I believe that's when she's coming back. Went to a consultation about getting my wisdom teeth removed, doing it in June after I come back from Megan's. Ok, thoughts. wondering if I made the decision too quickly about megan. Then, the other part of me says that loneliness makes me all funny in the head...meaning two things: one, perhaps it made me rush into a decision, and two, that's what's causing me to have doubts now, because I don't feel that way when she's around, no doubts when she's around. Also, they say that men look for women that remind them of their mothers. I hope that is not happening here on an unconscious level, because if it is, it won't work. Guess I just need a yea or nay from some trusted folks when they meet her. Makes me feel like I can't make any decisions on my own, though, seeking the advice of others in this matter. I've let it influence me before, ie, Nikki, but I agreed with it. that was for the best. what about here? I don't know. I agree with what I first said, I think...the second part of my mind, I mean. Loneliness is making me funny in the head. I'll feel better when I get to see her, or at least when the next semester starts, and we get to see each other regularly. Nervous about going up to her town to see her in a few weeks. Part of it is the drive...four hours through unfamiliar territory, including a big city (Winston-Salem). Then there's that I hope that my picky palate for food doesn't get my in trouble up there. There's also meeting all of these people that she's told about me...they all want to meet me. Oi. I won't put her through all that when she gets here...she'll just have to meet my mom, dad, Chrisanne, and the Szigedi's. well...I'm done talking for now...